Hey everyone! Ellie here, I am so excited to share a guest witter for today's "Wedding Wednesday" blog post, Jessi Holliday.
A few weeks ago I posted on instagram stories about how I was looking for some previous brides or vendors to write a guest blog post for all of us brides- to- bes. I think it's so cool to hear about what to expect on our big days from people who have experienced it or even work in the wedding field everyday. So if you're looking to do a post send me an email to (dailyelliestyle@yahoo.com) and we can get into the details :)
Now to get to know our guest writer, Jessi, a little bit,
I'm so happy Jessi stepped in to do this guest post for us! She's going to be sharing some tips. tricks, and some amazing advise for what we can do to prep for our big day. I've known Jessi for so long and actually grew up hanging out with her sister all the time. Jessi and her sister are both the sweetest people you will ever meet, and you will totally see that in Jessi's post. She's got some major writing talent and she is full of amazing advise. I know I needed to know a lot of this for my big day.
But enough from me, I'll go ahead and let Jessi take over from here.
ENJOY!
A few weeks ago I posted on instagram stories about how I was looking for some previous brides or vendors to write a guest blog post for all of us brides- to- bes. I think it's so cool to hear about what to expect on our big days from people who have experienced it or even work in the wedding field everyday. So if you're looking to do a post send me an email to (dailyelliestyle@yahoo.com) and we can get into the details :)
Now to get to know our guest writer, Jessi, a little bit,
I'm so happy Jessi stepped in to do this guest post for us! She's going to be sharing some tips. tricks, and some amazing advise for what we can do to prep for our big day. I've known Jessi for so long and actually grew up hanging out with her sister all the time. Jessi and her sister are both the sweetest people you will ever meet, and you will totally see that in Jessi's post. She's got some major writing talent and she is full of amazing advise. I know I needed to know a lot of this for my big day.
But enough from me, I'll go ahead and let Jessi take over from here.
ENJOY!
Hi Everyone! My name is Jessi Holliday. I’m an English Teacher, a newly wed, (almost a year!), and now a mom-to-be! I’ve known Ellie since she was a little girl. She was a childhood friend of my baby sister and she also lived just down the street from my own childhood friend. My mind still thinks of her as a 7-year-old little girl, bouncing on a trampoline with her hair in a high pony. But that was several years ago! She’s all grown up now, and so am I. I’m right at the age where all of my friends are getting married. In addition to planning my own wedding, I have attended 13 weddings in the last two years alone, and have participated in almost 10 weddings. I’ve held all the titles; bride, maid-of-honor, flower girl, bridesmaid, you name it! So when Ellie asked for volunteers to write a blog post on weddings, my English heart got excited and I knew I had to help her out. Because I’ve had so many experiences with weddings, I know that wedding stress is no joke. I’ve seen brides handle their stress gracefully, and I’ve also been witness to some serious “bride-zilla” behavior. One of my biggest fears while planning my wedding was getting too caught up in the stress of it all and losing some of the joy that being a bride can bring. Looking back, I can’t tell you that there weren’t stressful and overwhelming moments; but I do feel that there were 5 things that really made a difference in managing the stress of throwing my wedding and that’s what I want to share with you today.
1. MAKE LISTS
I am the oldest of three kids, which is probably why I am your typical type-A personality. I crave organization and order. I love a good plan, definitely no spontaneity for me, please! Making lists kept me sane. The first list I made was HUGE and super intimidating. I called this one the master list. It was a list of everything that needed done. This list was edited, added to, and removed from for almost my entire engagement. (So make sure you use a pencil!) As my plans and ideas changed I made the necessary adjustments to my master list. Having everything in one place like that was very helpful to me, as sometimes you just need to see the broad perspective of things. However; especially in the beginning, looking at everything that needed to be done all at once was very daunting. To make all my tasks seem less scary and more manageable I made more lists. This time, I made short(er) monthly to-do lists, starting with things that had due dates and needed to be accomplished first. I also took into consideration how much money I would need to tackle each list and how busy I would be in my personal and work life when assigning different tasks to specific months. To further in my list making frenzy, I made lists for every decoration organized by table. (cake table, guest table centerpieces, head table, ceremony guestbook table, unity table, etc.) I had lists of flowers, gifts I needed to buy, and items for the rest of the ceremony as well. I kept everything in a little notebook that fit in my purse so that I could carry it with me and make changes whenever I needed to. If you are more of a visual person, drawing maps or printing Pinterest pictures or even just creating boards would also be good options. It may seem crazy or excessive to some, but making lists kept me organized, it helped to clear my brain, and made my planning much easier.
2. COMMUNICATE
In my life I’ve learned that many problems can be avoided by keeping an open flow of communication. Looking back, I know there were some issues that could have been avoided if the lines of communication had been open. I had a couple of vendors and businesses that were not good about calling or emailing back. When you are choosing who to work with for your wedding, one of my best pieces of advice would be to search for reviews on the business or vendor’s reputation regarding communication. If there are any early signs that they won’t be communicative, I would back out as soon as possible. It will cause unnecessary stress that you don’t need. It is also important to not be afraid to ask questions. I am naturally a very soft-spoken person and I hate to feel like I’m burdening anyone. So calling multiple times or asking someone to clarify when I didn’t understand was not comfortable for me, but worth it to put my mind at ease.
It is also important to communicate with your people. One way that I did this was by making a schedule. My schedule started at the beginning of the day with my bridesmaids and I getting ready, ended with the tearing down and cleaning up, and included everything in between. I included things like times and locations for picture taking and other various tasks and specific line-ups for proceeding down the aisle and entering the reception. I gave a copy to everyone involved; every member of the wedding party, the parents of the children in the wedding party, our parents, anyone who was helping us set up or tear down, and the DJ. Everyone knew where he or she was supposed to be and I think this significantly cut down on confusion
It is also important to communicate with your people. One way that I did this was by making a schedule. My schedule started at the beginning of the day with my bridesmaids and I getting ready, ended with the tearing down and cleaning up, and included everything in between. I included things like times and locations for picture taking and other various tasks and specific line-ups for proceeding down the aisle and entering the reception. I gave a copy to everyone involved; every member of the wedding party, the parents of the children in the wedding party, our parents, anyone who was helping us set up or tear down, and the DJ. Everyone knew where he or she was supposed to be and I think this significantly cut down on confusion
3. DELEGATE
Whether you are planning a wedding with 100 guests or 400 guests, a wedding is a BIG event! There are so many details and tasks to complete. Expecting just one or two, or even a small handful of people to accomplish all of them is just asking for chaos. I know that giving up control of something that is so very important to you and so close to your heart can be hard for some people. Yours truly had an especially hard time with it. (Again, I’m blaming it on the Type-A thing.) But my wedding could not have gone on without my mother, grandmother, aunts, and bridesmaids. Making decorations, setting up our ceremony and reception, keeping order during the event and cleaning up after was absolutely a group effort. Even though it was hard for me to give up some control, I know that everyone who was helping me wanted my wedding to be everything I dreamed of as much as I did. I was able to relax and focus on other things because I knew that my people had my back.
4. “Relax, Babe! Your wedding day will be perfect!”
I will never, not ever, offer these “encouraging” words to any bride that I know. Because that’s so easy for me to say, right? My wedding is done and over with, I am no longer in the heat of the moment, in the thick of the planning. It’s also an impossible guarantee. How can anyone possibly promise that? So many people offered me some form of this phrase, and although I know they were being kind, it would frustrate me. I would nod politely, but took very little comfort in their encouragement. If I don’t make sure that everything gets done, who will? It was frustrating because they were basically reminding me that the “stuff” doesn’t matter, what matters is marrying the man of your dreams. This can be annoying because of course you know that! There is no one that could be any more excited about that than you are. But part of that dream is a beautiful wedding, and a beautiful wedding takes a lot of hard work that rests mainly on your shoulders, and because of that; right now, the “stuff” matters to you, and that is perfectly okay.
Now with that being said, I do need to say that no matter how annoying hearing that little piece of advice can be, there is some truth to it. Looking back, I cannot choose any other word besides perfect to describe my wedding. It wasn’t perfect because everything on my lists was checked off. It wasn’t perfect because everything went exactly as scheduled and according to plan, because that most definitely did not happen. To make a long story short, a drunk groomsmen didn’t make it down the aisle, a bottle of champagne was popped and sprayed down my back, the right song was played three different times, but not once at the correct time, it was HOT, and oh my Lord, the bug bites! But despite all of that, it was still perfect because I walked down the aisle towards my very best friend and I joined my life with his. The feeling I had in that moment, and for the rest of the entire night, was the most amazing, love-filled, euphoric feeling. It’s different than what you expect. It’s not like the falling in love, butterflies in your belly kind of feeling that I thought would happen. It was so much better than that. There aren’t quite enough words to describe what it’s like, but you’ll know it as soon as it washes over you. I am absolutely certain that not a thing in this world could have ruined it.
Now with that being said, I do need to say that no matter how annoying hearing that little piece of advice can be, there is some truth to it. Looking back, I cannot choose any other word besides perfect to describe my wedding. It wasn’t perfect because everything on my lists was checked off. It wasn’t perfect because everything went exactly as scheduled and according to plan, because that most definitely did not happen. To make a long story short, a drunk groomsmen didn’t make it down the aisle, a bottle of champagne was popped and sprayed down my back, the right song was played three different times, but not once at the correct time, it was HOT, and oh my Lord, the bug bites! But despite all of that, it was still perfect because I walked down the aisle towards my very best friend and I joined my life with his. The feeling I had in that moment, and for the rest of the entire night, was the most amazing, love-filled, euphoric feeling. It’s different than what you expect. It’s not like the falling in love, butterflies in your belly kind of feeling that I thought would happen. It was so much better than that. There aren’t quite enough words to describe what it’s like, but you’ll know it as soon as it washes over you. I am absolutely certain that not a thing in this world could have ruined it.
5. SOAK IT UP
My last and most simple piece of advice that I have for brides is to soak up every minute. That’s another one of those phrases that was offered to me a countless amount of times, but this one is worth saying. Even when you are in your last months or weeks of planning, when you’re so overwhelmed and you just can’t wait to be done preparing, soak it in. Your wedding day is the fastest day of your life. Every moment is so precious and I urge you just to revel in it. If you are one of the lucky ones, this will be the only wedding you have and my hope is that you savor it. If it is at all possible, I would not skip out on a videographer. One of the most treasured things that came from our wedding is our video. I watch our five-minute highlight reel often to re-live the most precious moments of our day. It was worth every penny spent to be able to treasure those memories.